Kurt Vonnegut and The No Asshole Rule

    I just heard that Kurt Vonnegut died. I loved his books and was touched by his sweet contribution, for creating the best moment I had when writing the book. His death makes me sad to think about, but his life brings me joy. All of us die in the end, it is the living that counts -- and Vonnegut touched so many people. Here is my story.

The process of writing The No Asshole Rule entailed many fun twists and turns.  But the very best thing happened when I wrote for permission to reprint a Kurt Vonnegut poem called "Joe Heller," which was published in The New Yorker.  I was hoping that Vonnegut would give me permission to print it in the book, both because I love the poem (more on that later), and Vonnegut is one my heroes.  His books including Slaughterhouse Five and Breakfast of Champions had a huge effect on me when I was a teenager-- both the ideas and the writing style.

I wrote some anonymous New Yorker address to ask permission to reprint the poem, and to my amazement, I received this personal reply from Vonnegut about two weeks later. Take a look at the two sides of the postcard, it not only is in Vonnegut's handwriting and gives me permission to use it "however you please without compensation or further notice to me," the entire thing is designed by Vonnegut (and I suspect his wife helped, as she is a designer).  "Life is No Way to Treat an Animal" is one of the famous sayings from his character Kilgore Trout -- even the stamp is custom.  It is one of my favorite things.

The poem fits well in my chapter on how to avoid catching asshole poisoning.  Here is how I set it up in the book:

'If you read or watch TV programs about business or sports, you often see the world framed as place where everyone wants “more more more” for “me me me,” every minute in every way. The old bumper sticker sums it up: “Whoever dies with the most toys wins.” The potent but usually unstated message is that we are all trapped in a life-long contest where people can never get enough money, prestige, victories, cool stuff, beauty, or sex – and that we do want and should want more goodies than everyone else.

This attitude fuels a quest for constant improvement that has a big upside, leading to everything from more beautiful athletic and artistic performances, to more elegant and functional products, to better surgical procedures and medicines, to more effective and humane organizations. Yet when taken too far, this blend of constant dissatisfaction, unquenchable desires, and overbearing competitiveness can damage your mental health. It can lead you to treat those “below” you as inferior creatures who are worthy of your disdain and people "above" you who have more stuff and status as objects of envy and jealousy.

Again, a bit of framing can help. Tell yourself, “I have enough.” Certainly, some people need more than they have, as many people on earth still need a safe place to live, enough good food to eat, and other necessities. But too many of us are never satisfied and feel constantly slighted, even though – by objective standards – we have all we need to live a good life. I got this idea from a lovely little poem that Kurt Vonnegut published in The New Yorker called “Joe Heller,” which was about the author of the renowned World War II novel Catch 22. As you can see, the poem describes a party that Heller and Vonnegut attended at a billionaire’s house. Heller remarks to Vonnegut that he has something that the billionaire can never have, "The knowledge that I've got enough." These wise words provide a frame that can help you be at peace with yourself and to treat those around you with affection and respect:

Joe Heller  

True story, Word of Honor:
Joseph Heller, an important and funny writer
now dead,
and I were at a party given by a billionaire
on Shelter Island.

I said, "Joe, how does it make you feel
to know that our host only yesterday
may have made more money
than your novel 'Catch-22'
has earned in its entire history?"
And Joe said, "I've got something he can never have."
And I said, "What on earth could that be, Joe?"
And Joe said, "The knowledge that I've got enough."
Not bad! Rest in peace!"

--Kurt Vonnegut

The New Yorker, May 16^th, 2005

(Reprinted with Kurt Vonnegut’s permission -- see the above postcard!)

P.S. Also added another post about Vonnegut after this one that was good fun, which talked about my favorite quote.

P.P.S. The first version of this post was written on February 22nd, the day The No Asshole Rule was published. But I then updated in mid-April of 2007, after I heard that Vonnegut had died.

Comments

[Kathy]

Wow. I plan to explore this site at length. Thanks for a lot to think about. Congrats on the Vonnegut permission and poem... He's one man I truly admire...

[jota]

Two words: Tom Siebel

Four more words: Who is Pat House?

Four final words: Where are they now?

three for the post script: Thank you Bob!

[GS Chandy]

Those are some fascinating posts on the "No Asshole Rule" - I'm still reading many of them, trying to make sense of many issues that arise in my mind. I have a few questions on the asshole issue that I believe you may not have adequately treated as yet:

I think it is becoming very clear to practically everyone in the world that the US has been led by a certified asshole (and the Gang he had gathered around him) of the highest possible grade since 2001. Why not work *effectively* to throw the scoundrel out and ensure that in future at least the US (as the world's sole superpower) would be led by real leaders and not by assholes?

(I have some thoughts on the above that I would like to contribute).

GSC

[Frank Roche]

Okay, that goes in the "very cool" pile. I guess getting my G.I. Joe dogtags in 1967 don't quite measure up. ;-)

[Chris Yeh]

Damn, Kurt Vonnegut is one cool dude.

Side note on famous authors: I heard a great quote from the late great Ken Kesey at a dinner I attended. When asked about Tom Wolfe, he simply replied:

"Shit floats, and cream rises. You can't always tell which is which just because it floated to the top."

[John Lilly]

great postcard!!

and an explanation for everything: assholes are just collections of bad chemicals.

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