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alex

its a pretty badplace when you try to communicate and your words are twisted or misrepresented as something else for the benefit of a bosses manipulation in order to empower himself more with power , and just for melicious motives which happens a lot in basd working envirements. Sometime it does not pay to communicate or be nice , especially if their are those whom have narcissitic personality disorders in all levels. The misuse of the word authority and its true meaning, which is fully practiced by many , especially in corrupt companies big and small, is their wordly and hitleristic natures. Their natures are monsterous. Its a disgrace the way they antagonise and manipulate their employees, (a new robot society of workers) and its even more a disgrace that they are allowed to do this to indivituals and get away with it if you do not comply with their corrupt demands and values.

R.M.

Creative P. Employer methods to force non-bung kissers to leave are as foloows:
verbal and emotional abuse
includes put-downs, bullying, intimidation, harassment, shame,
coercion, exerting values of power, being overworked
to extreme, lying, condescension, creating feelings of
powerlessness, being made to feel insignificant or
inferior, excessive demands of perfection, inconsistent
application of practices, not providing employees
sufficient information to perform, depriving of rights/
benefits, inappropriate nonverbal behaviors, ignoring,
belittling, talking down to another,

Connie

I work for a new department and a fresh new boss who was transferred from a company that my employer purchased and decided to 'merge' into ours. He was a successful sales rep with the old company and they decided to promote him to sales manager. He has less than 10 direct reports, only 3 of which do new sales. The first 6 months of his new job he spent going back and forth to another state while going through a divorce. All of our information comes from one of the salespeople since the new manager doesn't deign to speak with any of the rest of us--this salesperson has even mentioned sitting around in the new manager's local apartment during business hours.
I guess this guy is nice enough on the surface, but he's not inspired any trust in his abilities to lead. We've also heard rumors that he tends to talk about two of the salespeople (who think they have such a good relationship with him) behind their backs. He complains about X to Y and vice versa.

BetterNow

Our group worked for the classic bully. She was passive-aggressive, verbally abusive, micro-managed everyone, and totally incompetent. The high turnover in our department was very obvious. When we went to HR as a group to complain, they seemed to listen. A few weeks later I was chosen “just coincidentally” as part of the next round of layoffs. I had worked there for ten years and my performance was stellar. I suspect I was selected as the example to the others. Four months later, they are advertising for my replacement, but the position is now at an entry level. The ones who are still there are all on anti-depressants, have continual health issues, and work in fear of their jobs. There are zero other jobs for them to go to in our area. Maybe I’m missing something—there must be some corporate financial benefit—but I don’t understand why companies tolerate poor management, allow such horrible working conditions, and enable great employees to leave.

Anon (email address real)

1. Frequently interrupts your work to tell you what he has been doing. Belittles anything you have done.

2. Doesn't listen to your opinions, and only demonstrates that he values what you do if someone else from outside the group gives positive feedback to you.

3. Interrupts your conversations with colleagues and people from other organizations to correct things you say.

4. Tries to change how you work, e.g., what software you use, even though following his advice would make you as unproductive as him. Does so by shouting. When you point out that shouting in this way is unacceptable, he explodes even more. You have to take the afternoon off work to recover. Then, to crown it all, when realizing he was wrong (as you're the one who has expertise in the area, hence the reason he hired you), he asks you for help to install your software on his laptop.

5. Flips rapidly between being an asshole, and wanting to know personal information, small talk about partner, invitation for dinner. Next day, first thing, asshole again. Takes weeks to realize that to cope you have to remind yourself that even when he's nice it won't be long til he makes you feel like shit again.

6. Accuses you of making it "personal" when on the days it gets too much, after weeks of nonsense, you ask him what his problem is.

7. Demonstrates self-awareness, but shows no evidence of having done anything about it.

8. Everyone you meet who has met him - everyone! - has a story demonstrating that he is an asshole.

Lesa

Making a staff person drive 80 miles round trip at 9:00 pm at night to a client's house to get a (non-essential, non-urgent) signature because "we do whatever it takes to get the job done."

kishore koney

1. A boss who does not respect your decisions and career aspirations.

2. A boss who commits to your project deadlines without consulting you.

3. A boss who does not let you voice your opinion and cuts you short during discussions.

4. A boss who declares to be a open minded but all his actions show that he is closed from all directions.

5. A boss who does not understand work-life balance. He works 24/7 without a reason/focus and expects all his team members to do the same even when it does not add value at all.

Michael Ling

It's a simply a fact of life that we will encounter one of these guys at work. If you met them in the first couple of years at work, you'd be stuck and wouldn't know what to do. Why? Because I bet your school(or university/college) hasn't provided you with any hints or techniques on how to deal with these guys.

I don't know if universities would prepare us training for this kind of behavior. I honestly think they have a responsibility here..

Andy Satt

Yeah, these behaviors are all bad and abominable. However,who is doing anything against them?

In fact, these destructive bosses go on and destroy their people, their companies and, in the end, the welfare of our country.

It is not about blaming, but what about constructive ideas for solutions? Should we start in business schools? Are the shareholders to blame for letting this go on? Any ideas out there?

Aleksandar M. Velkoski

So many good comments! I can't say that I've worked for anyone THAT bad, but micromanagement has probably the worse. Some good things came from it though - I learned!

Jake

I have always loved the passive-aggressive approach to performance reviews.

My favorite personal experience involved me being dinged for poor business requirements and poor project leadership for a system that was launched over a year before I joined the company.

My manager was catching heat about the system's issues and somebody had to take the blame.

Christina@advancefacilitation.com

These experiences certainly make me cringe and I feel badly for the people who endured them. There's so much truth to the statement 'employees leave bosses/managers, not companies.'

That said, I often remind myself (and the people that I work with) that people will generally treat you the way that you allow yourself to be treated. There are exceptions of course, but I often see the step of two-way communication skipped before people decide to move on.

Ergoboy

You know your boss is an asshole when:

- He walks from cubicle to cubicle showing his reports the medal his kid won at a hockey tournament. Regardless of whether you cared or not, he told you the story about the game, and how upset he was at his son for taking the puck down the rink to attempt a goal, when he could have passed it to a team mate.

- He corners every employee that you work with and interrogates them looking for dirt on you. Any possible dust particle gets wildly exaggerated, documented, and then shown to you on a write-up.

- He takes the team out for lunch and asks "Tell me how I've made this a better place to work..."

- He screams at you for missing a short teleconference due to technical difficulties, where your deliverables were complete, and you could PROVE that you tried to call in twice.

- He exclaims to a beautiful female direct report that she "is looking ugly today".

- He doesn't pay for your going away lunch.

There was a mention of "happy endings" in other posts. Before I left this company, I documented all of this person's "transgressions", just like he did to me. I faxed it to HR before I left. About a month later, he was "laid off". I think the organization had him in their sites before I faxed my account of his behavior, but at least it was refreshing to know that it wasn't going to be tolerated.

Melanie

My former boss almost killed me and my unborn baby. She was such an incompetent psychopath that she had me working on a weekend when I was 6 1/2 months into a very high risk pregnancy. The only reason I had to work the weekend was that she micromanaged and forced me to go through several layers of approvals, including hers, before I was allowed to send my newspaper to the printer. I had been in the newspaper business for 20 years prior to having this nutjob forced on me. I had a printer date on Monday, but she had approved nothing on Friday. On Saturday, I took my older daughter to a sibling class at the local hospital. Then I had a birthday party for the older daughter. In the evening, I was so exhausted and discouraged that I was going to have to go to work on Sunday that I sat on my bed and cried. Five minutes later I was bleeding. My new daughter was born on Tuesday 11 weeks early. I almost bled to death. There's plenty of research that shows that stress can lead to premature birth. Yes, I do blame her and the top administrators that kept her on despite multiple complaints.

dblwyo

Bob - without disagreeing whatsoever with any of this it still bothers me at the most visceral levels because it makes no sense, serves no purpose, is counter-productive and violates all the rules I learned in kindergarten. Which is not to say that as a "boss" I can't look back on arrogant behaviors of my own but can also look back at more than one team that told others they liked working for me because I told it straight and treated people with respect. It seems to me a root cause is that nobody treats teaching managers how to treat their people with respect as a critical activity. Yet if you look at competent militaries teaching young officers how to do is a central part of their education. What does that say about strategic HR development ?

Karyn

Making you buy his lunch during your job interview because he "forgot" his wallet.

I didn't remember that for a long time until I started my escape plan. When I finally remembered this tid-bit after a few years of trauma, I exclaimed: "Lord, I should have known then!"

Audley

Since we're telling stories...I once had a manager who used to monitor how long I was away from my desk.

One day I received an email asking my whereabouts during lunch because I was missing for a considerable amount of time and I couldn't be found anywhere.

However, that particular day I was eating at my desk.

Hmmmm...

Bret Simmons

My first dean was a major asshole. He used to have a bunch of small plastic monkeys lined on top of his computer monitor at work. Whenever you would come to his office with an issue or to ask him about something, at the end of the conversation he would hand you one of his monkeys. This was meant to signal the monkey is on your back, not his - and he did not intend to do anything about your concern.

Bob Sutton

These are fantastic. I just got an email from John from Texas, who adds:

"There is a management rule I learned that says "You praise in public and punish in private"

You know that the boss is an asshole when he criticizes subordinate employees often and loudly in front of others but kisses his bosses asshole."

Good advice for al of us to remember

Anonymous

Turning a weekend sales retreat into a 22-hour meeting (6am-2am)

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