That is the title of an e-mail I got last week from a salesperson who had read about The No Asshole Rule. Below is the text (with identifying information removed, to protect both the innocent and the guilty):
My boss told me I was "a wimp and a pussy" because I was tired and lacked energy after 6 months of chemotherapy. He doubled my sales quota over a seven month period, and called about everyday tell me that I was a "fuck-up". I finally had to leave. I documented lots of the abuse, and presented it my superiors, they were very vague in their responses to me, but ultimately he was moved from manager to sales rep.
I think it is important to be reminded of stories like this one, which show the damage that assholes do. I list research showing the psychological, physical, and financial damage that these creeps do in The No Asshole Rule. But the stories behind the numbers are always far more compelling.
I thought it was important to print this email because I've been seeing too many stories lately on the virtues of nasty bosses, on the upside of leaving a trail of demeaned and psychologically damaged people in your wake as you climb to the top. In particular, I keep reading stories that portray the demeaning boss played Meryl Streep in The Devil Wears Prada in sympathetic light; and this morning's New York Times had column by David Carr that talks about the tough, smart, and effective -- and sometimes toxic -- Vogue editor Anna Wintour, who was the real-life inspiration for Streep's character. I wonder, if David Carr had a superstar boss who treated him like our salesperson if he would express so much admiration for is or courage and accomplishments.
Ouch. My boss of 10 years was always a screamer and curser, but her assholeishness is several orders of magnitude greater since she hooked up with her asshole boyfriend who is now her partner and co-boss. The last straw has been their treatment of me since my diagnosis of breast cancer, mastectomy, and post-surgical bad reaction to antibiotic (original boss, a PHYSICIAN, said "Bullshit!" when told that bad reaction made me unable to return to work full-time exactly 4 weeks after surgery).
There's much more -- but it's too exhausting to detail at this point. Let's just say that for 10 years I never used all my vacation time, usually less than half, and much of it was lost because it can't be carried over. Four allnighters within the past calendar year -- and I'm 54 years old -- and one of them was between surgical biopsy and mastectomy: boss informed me "we will be staying all night" (we including me, without my having a choice in the matter), but then they left once they finished their (late) part, leaving me to continue polishing their words to submit in time for deadline, alone from 1 AM until dawn, with not even cab fare or dinner, and certainly no overtime!
I have gotten out -- to another job within the large organization -- but the two co-bosses are furious at how THEY have been mistreated by the organization! You know, like someone in HR should have gotten my boss's permission before enacting the transfer. Cry me a river.
Posted by: maren | June 29, 2007 at 05:47 AM
Bravo for getting past the clever counter-intuitive nonsense about the "benefits" of toxic leaders, Bob. Stories like this one vividly demonstrate the damage that assholes, or in this case, sadists, can do to people.
Posted by: Tom Guarriello | July 11, 2006 at 03:55 AM
It amazes me that people like this get hired. I guess such behavior doesn't come out in typical job interview techniques. (People who never return phone calls are another type of employee that should be avoided). I always says that such personal attacks accomplish little except to give the attacker an ego boost. In fact, I think that it demotivates people to do a better job for you the next time.
Posted by: Atul | July 10, 2006 at 09:56 PM