Leaders get the behavior they display and tolerate

I was at a gathering of HR managers and executives yesterday held at Pixar, and one of the participants made this observation at one point. Frankly, there were a lot of people and we kept rotating among groups, so although I write it down quickly so I wouldn't lose it, I got so lost in thought about it that by the time I looked-up, we were all rotating to different groups and I lost rack of who said it.  I will try to figure out who it was -- yes, it is an oversimplification, but one of the most compelling ones I've heard.  I especially like that word "tolerate" as it conveys the subtle notion that there are often many things that happen in the workplaces that bosses don't try to discourage or stop because they have so much other stuff to do, they don't know how to go about stopping it, they believe they have more pressing matters to deal with, or they just don't have the emotional energy to deal with. 

Then,  I started thinking about this quote again when I was watching The Office last night and saw how the tolerant Jim (now co-manager) brilliantly dealt with a level of defiance and screwing around by Ryan that he couldn't tolerate by assigning him to an office in closet (see the episode here on Hulu).

Comments

[Karine Simard]

This is so true! We often talk about the behavior that leaders encourage, and about leading by example. However, if the boss does not condemn bad behaviors, it is perceived that he or she tolerated them.

[Peter Young]

This reminds me of your colleague Jeffrey Pfeffer's book, What Were They Thinking? Chapter 11 - that employees conform to what they take to be their boss's or company's most highly valued aspect of the work.

[Recruiting Animal]

To make this a better read start at:

There are often things that happen in the workplace that bosses don't try to discourage or stop.

They have a lot of other stuff to do; they don't know how to stop it or they just don't have the emotional energy to deal with it.

I started thinking about this again when I was watching The Office. Jim, now co-manager, brilliantly dealt with defiance and screwing around by Ryan by assigning him to an office in closet.