One Answer to the Question:""What's the Worst Advice You Advice You Ever Received?"

An editor at Psychology Today, where I am now blogging, wrote and asked for some ideas her might use in the print edition. His question was "What's the worst advice you've ever received (Or just some really bad advice ...).   I wrote him that I had received -- and given -- so much bad advice, that I couldn't pick a "worst," but told this story. 

Here is one -- with two pieces of bad advice.  When I was working on marketing my last book, The No Asshole Rule, I first had a publisher offer me a contract, but they insisted that I had to change the title --- in part -- because people wouldn't buy a book with that mild obscenity in the title.  I told them that I wouldn't consider an offer unless they went with the title and walked.  Then, as I was working on marketing the book in the months prior to publication a fellow with more than 25 years experience in the book industry insisted that I was nuts to send copies of the book to perhaps 100 bloggers (most of whom I knew because I am a blogger too) and to see if they might write something about the book months before it was published.  He insisted that trying to sell a book before it was available was waste of time and effort.  I believe that, in addition to the ideas in the book, that the main two reasons that the book became a New York Times bestseller are because of the title, which no one ever seems to forget, even when they hate it.  The second reason is that the buzz on the web created a lot of Amazon pre-orders, which helped the book become the #1 Non-fiction bestseller for much of the first week it was out and one of the top 5 business books for several weeks (it was ultimately the #8 business book for 2007).  When the book first came out, the major bookstores had done modest pre-orders and I had only a couple of stories in the media.  The Amazon numbers (created by pre-publication buzz) led the major bookstores to put in big orders and led the media to do many stories on the book. 

One of my mottos in life (which I first heard from a Stanford undergraduate years ago named Kathy) is "Don't believe everythingt hey tell you"  This is especially true if they add something like "I have been in the business for 25 years and I know what I am talking about."  As one of my former students, Andy Hargadon used to say in response to this line, "Do you have 25 years of experience, or have you experienced the same year 25 times?"

I wonder, dear readers, what your answer to this question might be, what is the worst advice you have ever received?

Comments

[Regan]

The only management book I have ever bought was the "No Asshole Rule" because it was about time someone put it in writing. It was a great book, my whole department loved it - they advised me give it to my boss to read - he did not see the humour in it, and he must have seen himself clearly fit the definitions of "asshole" because I lost my job shortly after giving him the book. So, although I think The No Asshole Rule is the best management book ever writen - I think the advice about giving it to your boss if he/she is a tyrant is pretty bad advice - didn't work out too well for me anyway.....

[Anon]

Most anything from undergraduate academic advising, particularly at public institutions.

Advising is critical to getting new undergraduate students started well but is shifted off on those faculty with little better to do because it isn't a valued activity and those doing it have few rewards for doing it well. This is an economic consequence of the differences between student tuition vs. grants fund flows. Because student butts will occupy the chairs no matter what, meaning someone will pay tuition for the spot, but grant monies, with the additional indirects that the administration gets to spend, are highly competitive, faculty rewards are weighted to that side and faculty respond accordingly.

In my case the university entrance test indicated that I should become an automotive transmission mechanic and projected a gpa of 2.0. My freshman adviser in the major promptly put me on the non-major track. Later I switched majors, found a supportive adviser and acquired a professional degree, a PhD and became a professor.

Now the same thing is happening to my children. In one's case the second ranked state public institution makes a big deal about their combined living/learning groups for science and engineering majors. He signs up finds there is no substance to it. Nothing. His adviser sucks, doesn't keep his posted office hours and the departmental secretary winds up signing him off so that he can register for classes. The delay meant that a critical class was filled by students that had gotten signed off sooner, which delays his graduation by at least a semester. Working a dysfunctional system is daunting for a freshman. Fortunately being faculty I can help him some but many parents don't have the knowledge that I do.

[BrianSJ]

On the subject of book titles (which you weren't), have you seen 'Golfing for Cats' by Alan Coren http://is.gd/9JvIu ? He worked out that the best-selling books were about cats, golf, and Hitler (the cover has a swastika golf flag).

[Shane]

A lecturer in college told me I was not cut out for HR. 20 years later ......

[Chris]

When, in late 1994, I suggested to the very intelligent president of the systems integration consultancy I was with that we needed to develop our software with an eye to the Internet, he said,"I've seen the Internet (I'm on Compuserve), and it's not going anywhere."

A few years later, the company was de-listed. Fortunately, I did not take his observations as career advice.

[Chris Weekly]

Here are a few gems from my life:
- Stop pushing yourself so hard in school
- Don't teach and travel in Europe
- Buying and living on a sailboat is ridiculous
- Setting up your own web server is a waste
- Don't have kids
- Forget about HTML and JavaScript, they're childs' play

Fortunately I didn't listen. :)

[Wolfc]

"Be patient" is some of the worst career advise I have received.

[sk]

The worst piece of advice I've gotten has been "trust me". The people I've run into in business who ask for trust generally don't deserve it. The people who deserve it, get it without asking.

[CareerAnnie]

A friend's wife told me that I would regret not having a big wedding like she did.

It was only after I had a very stressful wedding that she said, "Oh yeah. My wedding was the most stressful day of my life. It was awful."

So much for eloping.